Goodbye My Lover
by Danwea
Summary: It's the last funeral in the White Tomb where all the greatest Order Members have been laid to rest. Oneshot songfic. Told through Ron's eyes in flashbacks. Very sad, you may need your tissues. RHrm song fic to James Blunt's Goodbye my Lover written preDH


The rain poured down for the slate-coloured sky silently, as though it too was paying its final respects. A small procession of black cars pulled into the churchyard, the second one had flowers piled high over it, all in pink or white.

From the other cars came a group of six men who walked forwards to the flowery car and pulled the coffin from within onto their shoulders.

Everything was a mass of soaking grey blurs around them all, slowly changing all their emotions until they were only pain.

They carried the black coffin up the aisle until it was rested upon the altar and a bouquet of white and pink flowers was laid gently on top. The vicar rose to his feet once everyone was sitting down and began to speak to them and then a dark haired boy got his feet. He watched him walk to where the vicar had just stood. He did not hear what his friend had to say, but he did catch snippets of his words like, 'a wonderful person', 'intelligent' and 'the greatest sister a guy could ever have.' As his friend went back to his seat a small cry of a baby longing for their mother sounded next to him. He did not take any notice, he was empty inside apart from pain and he had a hard enough time failing to ease his own pain without trying to ease anyone else's.

Numbly, he got to his feet. _Maybe I should just run,_ a voice echoed in his head, but he stamped it down, she would've wanted him to stay, he needed to. He took a piece of parchment out of his black suit and taking a deep breath he began to read the words written across the page in her neat curly handwriting.

"Did I disappoint you or let you down?  
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?  
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,  
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.

So I took what's mine by eternal right.  
Took your soul out into the night,  
It may be over but it won't stop there,  
I am here for you if you'd only care…"

…_His pulse was racing as he walked over to her, his ears were glowing red yet he didn't care, she needed to know before they set off, he would never live with himself if – no he wasn't going to think like that. "Mione?" he asked gingerly._

_She looked up at him. _My god she looks so beautiful,_ he thought. He knew his mouth had dropped a little when he had seen her earlier that day for the first time, when he had seen her at the Yule Ball, but he didn't care then and he sure as hell didn't care now. Ever since that night he had wanted her, he thought maybe even before that too, all their little arguments but when she had hurt him the year before with her little birds he knew instantly that the feelings were being mirrored and he knew that everyday he spent with Lavender calling him Won Won, that he was breaking her heart. In the end she hated even being near him but now, now things were different. "Yes Ron?" she asked quietly._

_Blood was rushing away from his stomach. _Just do it!_ So he did. "Mione do you want to dance?" he mumbled, glowing scarlet, but the minute her heard her voice he knew that it was worth it._

"_I'd love too," she said. He noticed that she was a little flushed. She placed her hand into his own and he felt his stomach do a somersault. He took a quick glance at Harry, who was sitting next to his sister, and he grinned. Harry grinned back, watching his two best friends walking away with each other towards the dance floor where all the other couples were dancing, even Fred and George were dancing slowly with everyone else. He turned to Ginny and without having to be asked she got to her feet with him and walked to the dance floor with him._

_He blushed again as she placed her arms around his neck and he really did try and not let his hands slip too far down her back, but that was no use with the way she was arching into him, resting her head on his neck. It felt so right, just swaying there on the spot with her. He gently grazed his lips against her forehead and he lent down to whisper what he'd been threatening to yell at her since that night she'd gone to the Yule Ball with Victor Krum instead of him. It was the reason they had argued. It was the reason that he hated being away from her. It was the reason they were gently rocking together in each others arms desperately clinging to the other, praying they would not let go. It was the reason why she'd sent those birds at him. It was the reason Lavender had got so upset to see them apparently alone together in his dormitory. It was all those reasons that he took a deep breath and whispered to her, "I love you."_

_He knew that, with the way she did not jump away from him, or start to yell at him, that he'd said the right thing. Her head lifted off of his shoulder so that her cheek brushed against his own. "I love you too." He didn't have to look at her to know she was blushing, he could feel the heat of her flush against his own skin and he realised that only one hand was resting on the small of her back, the other was gently laying on her neck pulling her face to look at his own._

_He knew being with her would just make them an easier target for Him and his followers but Dumbledore had been right, Voldemort didn't understand love and he knew in that instant that he would be willing to sacrifice his own life as long as it meant she was okay._

_He tilted his head towards her own and, kissed her very gently. He felt silent tears slip down her cheeks but she did not pull away, she only kissed him deeper. It lasted what felt like a lifetime to them but he knew it had only been a minute if that. She gently rested her head back into his chest and he bent his head down and leant it onto her own. He'd never leave her, never_…

Taking another deep breath he continued, "You touched my heart you touched my soul.  
You changed my life and all my goals.  
And love is blind and that I knew when,  
my heart was blinded by you.  
I've kissed your lips and held your head.  
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.  
I know you well, I know your smell.  
I've been addicted to you…"

…_Their day's had been long and draining ever since the Second War had begun, since Dumbledore had died, since they'd promised Harry they'd do all in their power to help him, stay with him yet they did not care. He was like their brother after all and they weren't going to let him down, no matter how much the whole idea of killing Voldemort bit by bit, terrified them._

_He was sitting down in their lounge when she walked over to him, placed her ringed left hand on his cheek and pushed her husbands face towards her own as she sat on his knees. "Ron, look I need to tell you something."_

_He looked at her. "You're not having an affair with Harry are you?" he asked, raising an eyebrow._

"_No silly, it's really good news. Well, I hope it is," she told him. She seemed to be claming up on him and he knew she hadn't blushed that much since they'd had their first kiss, since they'd made love for the first time, since he asked her to marry him._

"_Go on," he said gently, urging her to tell him. "You know you can tell me anything."_

_She smiled at him and a pearly tear slid down her cheek. "I'm pregnant…"_

"Goodbye my lover,

Goodbye my friend

You have been the one,

You have been the one for me.  
Goodbye my lover,  
Goodbye my friend,

You have been the one,

You have been the one for me…"

…_Those nine months were excruciating. He wouldn't let her near as much as a kitchen knife on her own. He knew he was becoming overbearingly protective yet at those moments as her belly grew larger and they could feel their child moving inside of her he had to keep her safe and away from Voldemort. He forced Harry into becoming the Secret Keeper of their house and he, in turn, became the one for Harry's and Ginny's home over the road._

_He knew, the night when Hermione woke him in their bed that this night would stay in his memories for the rest of his life. He knew that even if Death Eater's tortured him into insanity the way they had Neville's parents that this would be the moment of glowing pride that they could never break away from his soul…_

The hall was echoing his words; his speech was the only sound. His voice was beginning to crack and break as he kept speaking, but he had to keep going, he had to speak these words she had wanted him too. He took a deep shuddering breath and continued, "I am a dreamer but when I wake,  
you can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.  
And as you move on, remember me,  
remember us and all we used to be  
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.  
I've watched you sleeping for a while.  
I'd be the father of your child.  
I'd spend a lifetime with you.  
I know your fears and you know mine.  
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,  
and I love you, I swear that's true.  
I cannot live without you…" His tears began to fall thick and fast, not caring that he was surrounded by friends and family.

…_She was lying on the bed, worn out and slipping into sleep. "I love you so much," he told her as a small bundle was placed gently in his arms. "I'm so proud of you."_

"_Just knowing that you still love me is enough," she whispered, attempting to sit up. "I'm exhausted!"_

"_I'm not surprised," he said, cradling the child in his arms. "What are we going to call her?"_

"_We could call her Charlotte," she said a sad smile creeping over her face._

"_Charlie would've liked that." She nodded and reached her hand out to stroke the child's head._

_The door to the room opened and Harry walked in. Harry looked so tired and worn these days, many believed that, since Sirius and Dumbledore had died he had taken so much on with the fight against Voldemort. There were dark grey shadows under his eyes and his hair was ruffled as though he'd just come out of a high wind._

"_Hi mate, come and meet your goddaughter," said Ron, nodding down to the small bundle in his arms._

"_No, you can't, I'd only hurt her," he said as he neared the bed on which Hermione lay._

"_Don't be a prat Harry!" stated Ron._

"_But I will! I'm a magnet for danger and pain!" he told them, flinging himself into the nearest chair._

"_Harry, stop thinking that way, you won't hurt her. Look, there are plenty of us that haven't been hurt yet, plenty of the Order still around. You keep them strong, you keep them motivated, we want you to be her godfather Harry, we know you'd look after her if anything did happen to us, we know you would. Look, would your mum and dad have asked Sirius if they had known that he'd hurt you? No, and he wouldn't have done! He loved you Harry, and we love you! We want you to be her godfather, be her guardian. Anyway, the friends of your parents are still plentiful, still around…" But Hermione cut off as tears welled into Harry's eyes._

"_Remus is dead," he muttered, whipping the tears from his eyes._

"_No," breathed Ron, his mouth hanging open. Tears had begun to creep into Hermione's eyes and splash down her face._

"_How?" she asked._

"_I'm not sure, but I have a feeling that Voldemort killed him himself. Moody and your dad found his body this morning," he told them, nodding towards Ron._

"_It's just not fair!" Hermione stated as Ron placed his daughter into the arms of his best friend._

"_I feel terrible, he'll never meet his children and here I am with Mione as happy as can be naming our daughter!"_

"_Ron, please don't say stuff like that," said Hermione, placing a hand on his lower arm._

"_But it's not fair! Too many of us are dying!" he shouted, causing the little girl to begin to cry. "The Ministry don't even care! The only one of us they cared about was Dumbledore, and he died three years ago! We're out there putting out heads on the line for them and they don't give a damn about us! Remus was a decent guy and there will only be a handful of people at the White Tomb to say goodbye! Hardly anyone showed up for Sirius' memorial! It was the same for Charlie, Hagrid and Malfoy, not even my family and that guy saved my life! No one for Seamus, no one for Dean, only Neville's grandmother showed for his funeral and he died the bravest one of us all! It's sickening to think that no one cares about the saviours of the wizarding world! We're the only ones even attempting to stand against Voldemort and… and now Remus…" Ron was shaking violently as Harry rocked the baby in his arms._

"_Now Harry, meet your goddaughter," said Hermione, quickly changing the subject. "Charlotte after Charlie, Ruby after Hagrid and Luna after Remus, how's that Ron?" asked Hermione._

"_Yeah sweet heart, that's perfect…"_

His voice was cracking with every word he spoke now. Tears were splashing down his face and onto the parchment and he continued, taking deep shuddering breaths as he carried on. "Goodbye my lover,

Goodbye my friend

You have been the one,

You have been the one for me.  
Goodbye my lover,  
Goodbye my friend,  
you have been the one,  
you have been the one for me…"

…_The church was dark and the only light was coming from the candles that were glowing strangely green._

_A man stood before the three of them, his pale figure cloaked in black. "Well, well, well, you bring your friends to their death! Have my warnings not been enough for you to spare their lives? That bumbling oaf of a giant, the pathetic Malfoy child who dared to double-cross me, the pathetic tame werewolf and those friends of yours from school! Oh and then there was that pathetic one who I believed to be my most loyal but no! The double-crosser double-crossed everyone and he would've rather have died than see that happen to you! Well, I don't care Potter, three more lives will be taken tonight, and then I will be unstoppable!"_

"_Not one of us fears death Voldemort! There's nothing you can do to us that we could possibly fear!" shouted Harry as he pulled the Gryffindor sword from the scabbard that was tied in his belt loop._

"_Really Potter?" Voldemort asked. He waved his wand in the direction of Ron and a great turquoise light erupted from the end of his wand._

"_NO!" shrieked Hermione as she jumped in front of Ron, blocking the curse from him. She crumpled to the floor._

"_MIONE!" he screamed dropping to his knees beside her. "Oh god, no!" he shouted. "No, no, no, no, no!" Tears were falling down his face as he lifted her head from the ground and stared into her eyes, "Mione?"_

"_Hermione!" shouted Harry. "That was uncalled for, I'm the one you want!" he shouted running towards Voldemort who waved his wand and Harry flew backwards, hitting the floor hard._

"_Mione please don't be dead please don't leave me alone! I need you, Charlie needs you! Please darling, please? Wake up; oh God please let her wake up!" Ron cried, tears spilling from his eyes. "No, I refuse to let you go! NO!"_

_Her eyes opened a little and she forced a weak smile. "Please Ron, don't cry," she whispered._

"_Oh thank God you're alive!" he shouted, only just hearing Harry yell in pain as a loud thud echoed around the room._

"_Ron, listen to me," she was sounding weaker by the minute. "I'm not going to make it…"_

"_Yes – you – are!" he said with so much emphasis on each word and so much belief in his voice that tears crept into her eyes and began to slid down her pale cheeks._

"_I'm not, and you know I won't. Look, just don't let Charlie forget me, tell her everything about me, show her in Dumbledore's Pensive if Harry will let you but Ron, please, just don't do anything stupid, don't hurt yourself because he's beaten me!" she said the tears beginning to cease due to her lack of energy and life._

_He grabbed up her hand in his own and squeezed it tightly. "Mione, please, don't die, please I need you…"_

"And I still hold your hand

In mine

In mine when I'm asleep

And I will, bear my soul in time

When I'm kneeling at your feet…"

"_Search whatever you have left of your soul _Tom_, do you have the mutilated bits? Do you?" He heard Harry scream as a loud, dull thud sounded as a whisper of a man, once powerful and terrifying spoke, "No."_

"_Ron, he did it, Harry's won, we've won! Voldemort has gone!" she sounded happy yet he did not turn to look at his best friend. His gaze was resting on the woman in his arms as he watched the life ebb away from the greatest witch of her age. _

"_Yeah, that's great," he said unenthusiastically. "Mione, please don't leave me… not now… not after all of this pain has gone. I love you too much to let you go…"_

"_I will always be here for you no matter how hard you try to get rid of me; I will, I promise… all you have to do is call for me…" She took a deep shuddering breath. "I love you Ron, I always have and I always will…"_

"_Mione," he whispered as her hand slipped from his own and fell with a thud to the floor. Her eyes were closed, yet her expression was happy. He felt her body relax beneath him as his tears fell so fast he was blinded by them._

"_MIONE!" he screamed. "No, no, no, don't go, no, no, NO…!"_

"Goodbye my lover,

Goodbye my friend

You have been the one,

You have been the one for me.  
Goodbye my lover,  
Goodbye my friend,  
you have been the one,  
you have been the one for me…" He almost collapsed forwards, but Harry was there already, gripping hold of him in a brotherly embrace.

"It's alright mate, just let it out," he whispered in Ron's ear, tears trickling down his own face. "Just let it all out, just grieve…"

_I'm so hollow baby_

"She's gone, isn't she?" he grumbled as the parchment fluttered to the floor.

_I'm so hollow_

"She's really gone!"

_I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow_

"Harry! I need her!" he screamed as his baby began to cry again.

_I'm so hollow baby_

"Please, don't let her go! NO! MIONE! PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME!"

_I'm so hollow_

"MIONE!" he screamed in despair.

_I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow_

A tiny voice echoed in his head quietly as a wispy figure materialised at the end of the White Tomb, right near the entrance, staring straight into his blue, tear soaked eyes. It waved and blew a kiss, and then mouthed the words, "I told you darling, I will always be here for you if you need me…"


End file.
